James Bernard Raffel

James Bernard Raffel of Cutchogue passed away peacefully at home surrounded by his family on Dec. 7, 2025 at the age of 74. His courageous, year long battle with glioblastoma was over.

He was born March 7, 1951 to Helen Sophie Troyan and William Bernard Raffel, and lived most of his life on the North Fork. In his early years he attended Northville School and worked on his Uncle Peter’s farm. He especially loved driving tractors as a child and plowing and planting, and always had a big vegetable garden.

He graduated from Riverhead High School in 1969 and to his parent’s surprise, enlisted in the U.S. Coast Guard for four years. His motto always was “semper paratus,” always ready. He later made his living on the bay, scalloping, taught by his Uncle Bill. He met his wife, Maria (née Berdinka) of 49 years during this time. Maria remembered meeting this “kind, strong, handsome man” who worked on a boat in the extreme weather. She was “hooked immediately.” Jim and Maria married in 1976. Their children, Emily Maria Fossum, of Sante Fe, New Mexico, and Simon Peter Raffel, of Ferndale, Michigan, were welcomed joyfully following.

Jim went on to work at the Plum Island Ferry, Port Jefferson Ferry and also on the tugboats on the eastern seaboard. He loved hiking, going to the mountains, fixing things, nature and just going out and anchoring up in the bay. He had a deep, quiet faith and mass was a priority. He was a devoted husband, father, uncle and neighbor.

Besides his wife, son and daughter; Jim also leaves his sister Irene McCarthy of Ridge, N.Y. and his brother Eddie (Joanne) of Riverhead. He was predeceased by his brother William “Sammy” Raffel (Mary) in October of this year. He also leaves behind his godchild and niece Annie Raffel of Calverton, and many nieces and nephews.

The family received friends on Tuesday, Dec. 9 at the DeFriest-Grattan Funeral Home in Mattituck. The Liturgy of Christian Burial was celebrated on Wednesday, Dec. 10 at Our Lady of Good Counsel R.C. Church, officiated by Father Michael Bartholomew. Interment followed at Sacred Heart R.C. Cemetery in Cutchogue, where the U.S. Coast Guard thanked Jim with a Military Honors Service graveside, followed by a prayer led by Father Mike.

Although this is a time of unspeakable sorrow for his family and those who loved Jim, we are comforted that his suffering is over, and we pray that he is in a place of light, happiness and peace with the Lord forever. His life was a gift to us all. Thank you from his family for all the kindness shown over this past year and with his passing.

In lieu of flowers, donations to the North Fork Parish Outreach, Post Office Box 584, Greenport, NY 11944 would be appreciated.

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